Embracing feelings

People have different approaches to feelings: Some people have their whole life led and guided by feelings, they believe all their feelings to be true, and they trust them like a detailed navigation map. Others, on the other hand seem to be completely aloof to their feelings, they claim that they obtain only 2 kinds of – tired and hungry. Those people are drawn to logic and proven facts, seeing science as a new and improved god and trusting nothing but numbers.

Then, between these black and white extremes are all shades of gray. Most people find feelings to be challenging, overwhelming. Particularly people that are more sensitive and of an introverted nature. Those that find themselves drawn to art, spirituality and meditation are commonly of that nature, for it is their sensitive nature and introspection that leads then to feel things more intensely and experience life in a more vivid way.

Feelings can be portrayed in a visual way as fussy little lively colored creatures, which keep popping in and out of our lives, painting our moods, effecting our personality, lighting or darkening our experiences, dressing up and undressing our self-image, influencing our sleep, our daily habits and our overall sense of self. The way we experience ourselves.

We can see them in different ways, however, they are there.

We can give them more attention and try to get to know them, hear their message and listen to their claims or doubt their core authenticity all together.

It is rare to find anyone that doesn’t like only their “positive” feeling or those feelings that are a result of fulfilled needs. Who will reject a feeling of joy, pleasure, contentment and ease? However the dark side of feelings, those that are a result of unfulfilled needs, are seen as a plague one must get rid of and avoid at all cost.

Feeling sad, angry, shame, bitter, hopeless and of course the dreaded depression, are considered enemies of oneself or of a good life.

It would be interesting to suggest and explore a different approach, one that embraces our wholeness and the richness of life and of our emotional spectrum. Metaphorically, loving and welcoming only the so called positive feelings is like choosing to paint only with warm colors such as red and yellow, while refusing to use cold one such as blue and green. Why would we limit our range of experiences, rather than learn to see their unique beauty? Accepting our humanness our primal needs without adoring one’s personality or getting attached to the narrative of life, but yet not rejecting it either.

We are here, in this life in this body, in this (weird) moment in time and space.

This is what is.

And in it all we may have feelings, and those feeling may not reflect a fulfilled need, and therefor can uncomfortable. That is just how it is. We can push these feelings away, ignore them or feed them. These are just a few of our options. However the real gift in having options is that we can choose not to do a thing. And in that non-doing we can stay aware, present and embracing. This embracing is not giving into or letting a feeling control us, but rather seeing it, accepting it and then from a space of power, in separation and distant from that very feeling, feel ourselves.

Focused on our self our point of view is completely different and it is in fact where our feeling are hoping to lead us. Focused on ourselves we develop clarity and strength on how to respond to a situation and how to simply be.